Dr. Bharat Desai's Blog
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As far as you are sharing your views, events and a few of your photos, everything is fair enough and natural. If you are too much eager to ask for so many likes, comments and sharing your presentation, frustration is imminent!


Girls do "Gauri Vrat" to get a good husband. After getting one, they do "Kadava Chouth" and "Vat Savitri Poonam Vrat". This is customary amongst all.

At the same time, boys and later the married men do not follow any such ritual, nor do they do any fasting at all.

Present day thinking leads to breaking a relation on many occasions. It is undesirable but still natural. Don't get panicked about it; relax and think over the following:

When you hear or read some intelligent people like Osho, Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev or any alike, you start agreeing to whatever they say. Not because you are his follower or student, but because the content is true. Then you hear or read what he tells about some other topic and you again agree in total. Now the paralysing of your intelligence has begun.


You surrender in total. Without your awareness, you stop thinking and become dependent on him. This is "paralysing intelligence".

Beware!
When you are happy and relaxed, you feel everything is going well. This results in the negligence of four musts for health:
  1. Exercise
  2. Diet consciousness
  3. Rest 
  4. Sleep

The end result is an unconsciously added obesity... a lifetime friend!
We receive messages in conversations and communications, and a reply or at least some response is expected by the sender. But more often than not, this replying does not take place. Even we are unaware of this and find no problem with this attitude. We do not feel sorry for not responding. I asked why this happens and this article is the outcome of the said question.

While talking, someone asks a question and waits for the reply with frustration of getting none. Similarly we receive letters, messages on mobile phone, Whatsapp, Facebook, e-mails, Twitter and many other methods we use on the internet. Everywhere, the ‘replying’ is surprisingly missing. You will be surprised to know, the reasons are either absent or practically insignificant-trivial. Even when one remains absent at a wedding, birthday party, marriage anniversary, inaugural function or any such important occasion where he/she was invited, they do not convey any message of greeting and regarding his absence.
We are social animals. We have friends and relatives. Being socially attached, we need and desire to meet them. So the question is: Where do you meet them nowadays?

Well, honest and multiple answers to this simple question are quite simple. Let me enumerate the list of present-day meeting places.


Whatever smartness or intelligence one has, to anticipate the probable attitude of the future partner is difficult. So for the continuation of the marriage, adjustment and compromises are must, compulsory.



One has to marry because the law does not allow man-woman physical relations at random and society has laid certain norms of man-woman staying together. Though liberate present-day scenario allows live-in relations and physical relationship without much fuss, marriages are unavoidable.

Once decided to marry, the second question arising is the method – the technique of the wedding. How many persons to be invited, the place of the wedding, the menu and its preparation and the details of the function is the subject of this article.

Are credit cards a BOON? – YES.
Are credit cards a CURSE? – YES.

You may be surprised reading this answer to these questions appearing rather simple. But the exercise of this article is to compare the advantages and drawbacks of credit cards after understanding the issues relating to it and finally, deciding where the truth lies.


How does someone's habit bother you?
What is your concern about a person's habit?
Before discussing about the habits in general and bad habits in particular, I would like to reply these two questions.

We, the humans, are social animals. We live together a life in a society with people around us. Many a times, the dialogue with any individual with bad habits irritates us, disturbs our mood and sometimes makes us angry. Thus the awareness about good manners without bad habits is highly important. You see, habits die hard. But the bad habits die harder!


A self-destroying compulsion, what really is Comparison? We mean it as an evaluation of the similarities and differences of one or more persons/entities to some other persons/entities. So, it is an account of resemblances and contrasts as superior or inferior. We humans have an inherited habit of comparing ourselves with near ones, friends and relatives, usually after considering them to be superior in our imaginary belief.
Air, water and food are must for a life, we know. But, many of us do not know that sleep is the fourth most essential for life giving sound body and mind. Loss of sleep, better known as insomnia, present in the third of the world's adult population leads to mental depression, a life threatening disease. An adult needs six to eight hours of uninterrupted profound sleep every day. How to ensure this?

Let us understand the ways to deal with this issue point to point, and to get sound sleep.
Generally, the wedding of a daughter is event parents plan from the day of her birth. They start saving money and dream about the son-in-law to be. But all these have one condition tagged – “Consent of Parents”. Or say a final decision has to be with and as per the will of the parents. When this does not happen and daughter decides to marry at her own will – against the consent of parents, they get shocked emotionally to its deepest level and this is the subject of my discussion.

Money. How much is enough? Present time has created an impression that more the money more the happiness. Poverty makes a person inferior in this society, however clever, intelligent, honest and hardworking he or she may be. So, the young generation of the day has clear idea of being rich by earning more and earning at the earliest. So the question arises, how much money is enough money? Before giving the clear cut answer as I am certainly going to do – I would like to tell you the evolution of money.

My random thoughts on the demise of a mother. What do I understand while pronouncing “mother”?

I do not need to go far away. I just see so many mothers around, to name a few, I shall say:
                Dr Bhavana Desai (My wife)
                Dr Amita Desai
                Dr Shefali Naik
                Mina Vijay Desai

And I just see a few single mothers like:
                Dr Indumati K Desai (My mother-in-law)
                Vasuben Radhod (My hospital staff)
                And many more.

What I have learnt about ‘mothers’ from them, is, they are:
                For their offspring in total, forever.
                Thinking about them all the while.
                Living only for them – offering all they have.
                Round-the-clock ‘mothers’ and nothing else – ignoring their own identity and profession.
                In so much love with their children, they ignore any insulting behaviour they get.

I would like to quote some of the famous personalities from Gujarati literature and spiritual leadership.

Morari Bapu:
  • Mother is one who offers all she has – total offering.
  • Mother is a great mixture of forgiveness (Pardon) and compassion (Mercy).
Suresh Dalal:
  • Mother is blind towards her children. And she may not love all others alike.
  • Mother knows all that her child needs, and she will give it even before she/he demands.
Gunvant Shah:
  • We miss seeing what is near to us. And so we never realise a mother’s importance – thereby we miss acknowledging and appreciating her.
  • Mother has total acceptance for her child, however bad or misbehaving the child is. She will love and bless to her maximum.
On learning about the demise of somebody else’s mother, I have observed some people saying, ‘I have never met her’ or even daring to say, ‘I was not aware their mother was alive at all’. This is too much, and unfortunately not uncommon.

All we need is to define the list of our close friends and be in regular touch – visit them as frequently as possible, and be with them. If you find someone not worth your friendship, forget him. But be sure to maintain a few intimate-close and total friends. Loss of touch is a modern-day problem, best avoided.

It was only a few days before you had the last touch of your mother – the touch before saying the final bye-bye. The last touch means thereafter you won’t be able to touch your alive mother again.

Well, then to make it alive, love the mothers of others who are alive. Love, respect and do everything for her that you would have done for your mother.

We can easily say goodbye to our mother on her last departure if we have:
Respected her during her lifetime,
Honoured her all she dues,
Not allowing her to be unhappy or weeping because of us…

And still, nothing you do is enough.

Have you served your mother to your satisfaction?
While being surrounded by strangers struggling with their problems at a public place, say,
in a lift,
in a waiting room,
in a queue at the bank, cinema,
or
elsewhere,
we remain silent and make no conversation.
Because we think it to be a bad manner, awkward or challenging.

That is not right. Instead, try with a smile, raising your hand and a small-talk. Talk may be about anything; say weather, long waiting or just anything like that. I am sure it will not only relieve the tension but also create a forging bond between humans.

We understand, only bacterias, viruses and fungi spread infection and they are contagious. But there are many behavioural factors that lead to their own spread, and we do not notice them.

Actually, behavioural matters spread faster than we think.


Wabi-Sabi is a Japanese philosophy that celebrates-respects "age" and the imperfections created by ageing (usually in inanimate objects like vases, wooden benches, etc.).

All over the world, the lines of the palm on the hand are thought to be deciding the fate of an individual. There is a study describing the reading of this lines on the palm, known as "Palmistry".

Activeness on Facebook, Whatsapp, Twitter and Blog

If you want to be active on all these social media platforms, do so.
Do not hesitate.
Do express all you want.

But...

Be prepared for poor or zero response/feedback.
The expectation of active communication may lead to frustration... depression.


I am happy to address my readers once again with a very important subject of day-to-day problems: Stress.
Stress is a force that strains and deforms. People, events and circumstances take over you, and create stress. It is a physical expression of emotional insult. Emotions like Fear, Guilt, Shame, Anger, Worry, Guilt and Doubt lead to stress. 
That practically covers every normal, routine emotion. Then, how can we deal with stress?
Facebook Friends

More the number of friends, more the time needed to see their updates and respond. Sometimes, one feels it is a waste of time.

So better avoid unknown, half-known and the friends of friends types.

What is the ideal maximum number?

When should a doctor retire?


Your reply is a must...
ICU (Intensive Care Unit). It is the most alert and up-to-date department in a hospital.


Minimum expectations of the patient admitted here are would be:
  1. There is a doctor present all the time (round-o-clock) to treat the patient and attend to any emergencies.
  2. The present doctor must be having technical skills and know-how in the management of critical care. He/she may be a Physician/Anaesthetist/Critical care treatment specialist.
  3. Necessary gadgets like a cardiac monitor, ventilator, pacemaker, cardiac defibrillator and such others are present in working condition.
  4. Emergency Medicines, Oxygen, continuous electric power and assisting staff on duty.
Addiction

Internet users with Facebook, Whatsapp, Emails and what not, very well know the (usefulness and) uselessness of the continuous connectivity and still can not stop the wastage of time in this activity. Just like the addicts of alcohol, smoking and tobacco chewing...


Addiction to be attended to as an emergency

Beware if you are seeing in your mobile/computer while being with someone talking to you. You are missing a great real moment for virtual reality and showing a great insult to the people around.


This is internet addiction needing urgent attention. Real life relationships and persons around are more important than distant imaginary 'virtual' world.
Just owning a camera does not make you a photographer!

You have to learn the fundamentals of photography and technical know-how of cameras, or you will come out with dull and irritating photos. I request my friends to be kind enough to see the image, its light and contents ("the subject") appearing in the frame before using the "CLICK" button.


After Parsis, Anavils (Anavil Brahmins, અનાવિલ બ્રાહ્મણ ) are the fastest decreasing community. The total population of Anavils around the world does not exceed two lakhs figure and that is also fast reducing day by day. Days are not far, beyond a century or so, when they will have to be seen/found in records, photos, and videos. Why?

Because,
   - they get married too late,
   - many are dying unmarried,
   - they wait for the career to be settled before the first (and maybe the only) childbirth.

So,
   The number of children per couple is either one or zero.
   It is certain that nothing can save this community from extinction - vanishing!
Let me try to introduce this community.

Mr. Klass W VanDer Veen - a Dutch scholar and Professor at Amsterdam University prepared a thesis on "Anavils" and wrote a book "I Give Thee My Daughter ". He concluded, "Anavils are smart, efficient, and clever but heavily disunited.”

British Government recognized Anavil as one with a sharp intellect and efficient administrator.

Ambelal G Desai (Valsad), Author of a book on Anavils of South Gujarat, who studied Anavilism extensively, said: “By and large, the people of this area – Anavils – are clever, frank, tolerant, quiet, luxury-loving and cheerful. They are not prone to quarrel readily and are not found wanting in doing whatever could be achieved lawfully.” (Anavils of South Gujarat was published in 1969 in Gujarati, and translated in English by Harish Desai and Hakumat Desai in 1995)

Captain Newport (1882) had personal and extensive contact with Anavils. He found Anavils as:
  1. Flattering and obedient
  2. On being questioned, they would hardly give a straight answer. They would either give the wrong answer prompted by selfish motives or feign ignorance.
  3. Best Farmers
  4. Smart and industrious
  5. Intelligent
The settlement report (1868) with the British says:
  1. They are known for their tact and quarrelsome nature.
  2. They are firmly insistent on getting their viewpoint accepted.
  3. They are fond of litigation and fight with unusual tenacity for a tree, a piece of land, or for a confiscated right. Only death can end their dispute.
  4. They cannot be won over by arguments or negotiations. 
I am adding my own impressions of Anavils being an Anavil one-self and staying amongst them for 64 years in two Hindi words: Aapvadai (Superiority complex) and Hamsachchai (My truth is the only truth).
  1. Superiority Complex: We (Anavils, that is) have inherited this virtue because of being “King" - the rulers. Each one of us considers him/herself "The Best" of all around and the most intelligent individual, whatever the real IQ level may be. This simple-looking virtue becomes bad to worse later when he/she progresses to consider all others inferior to him/her. The real problem starts here and because of this lack of respect for one another in particular and community, in general, cannot be expected. The unity amongst caste fellows is not to be dreamt of.
  2. My truth is the only truth: We are intelligent people and good administrators, but we dominate. Whatever one says is the only truth and it has to be followed by everyone. It is not optional nor there is any scope for correction or discussion. This nature has led to many poor relationships amongst each other and no fellow is available.
From Prime Minister, Physician, and Pleader to Peon – Anavils are everywhere!

We were living and belonging to South Gujarat (in India), from Kosamba in the north to Vapi towns within the south. 120 kilometers area between rivers Daman Ganga in the south to Kim in the north was inhabited in South Gujarat (India) by Anavils. Nowadays one can find an Anavil anywhere in any country in the world.


You can find Anavils anywhere, say:
Prime Minister of India, Morarji R Desai
Chief Justice of India, Dhirubhai Desai
Governor of the State (Andhra Pradesh), Khandubhai Desai
Managing Director of L & T, Anil M Naik
Physician to President of India, Dr Chhotubhai Naik
Pleader, Bhulabhai Desai
The list can never end until you fill all the important positions by Anavils. Let’s go deeper into history.

History of Anavils

The history of Anavils has deep roots. 5,000 years back, Anavils were brought to a village named Anaval  (then known as Anadipur) in South Gujarat from Ayodhya by Hanuman for doing Maha Yajña for Shri Rama who wanted to wash out the sin of killing King Ravana – a brahmin. They were Aryans migrated from Afghanistan.

According to the Court poet Bhukhan of Chatrapati Shivaji Maharaj, the population of Anaulla (now known as Anavils) were staying at Magadh around Bihar. The ruler Anavil named "Putrak" married to Naga Kanya "Patli" and they constructed the capital city of their state "Patli-Putrak". He said, the great Chanakya, also known as Kautilya, was Anavil.

After this great mission, these Brahmins labelled as Anavils became ruler of Kingdom Anaval. Anaval state had Vyara, Mahuva, Vansada and Chikhali talukas.

Buddhists took the Bhil community in hand to have a war with Anavils under the leadership of Vansia Bhil. The Anavil king lost this war. Around 1186 AD, the Anavil king Samandhar Vashi won the war against Vansia Bhil with the help of Rajput King of Paatan, Siddharaj Jaisinh. But he lost interest in Kingdom and gave it to Rajputs. King Digvirandrasinh was the last Rajput ruler of this state, later named as Vansada state.
Anavils were spread all around 300 villages of South Gujarat. I must tell about a few important ones with their relevant stories.
  • Anaval: Anaval is 60 km from Surat and Navsari having Shukleshwar Mahadev Temple on the bank of river Kaveri. It is considered to be the primary place of Anavil settlement in the region and Brahmins who resided here became famous as Anavil Brahmins (1932 Anaval Jagat). Anaval is our birth-place and Lord Rama had installed Lord Shukleshwar himself (1906  Vasanji Desai). Shri Kalidas (in Mukta Shastra) said Anaval was inhabited by Anavils and their marble decoration was comparable to Paris and Venice.
  • Surat: Majority of land was owned by Anavils. The credit for creation and growth of Surat city goes to Anavils. It was only Anavils, the active force in this District as it is in their names they formed different "Para" resided by a specific group of Anavils. Residents of Surat are using these names for described area till today.
  • Gandevi: "Desaiji Pedhi" of Anant Vashi is known for last 400 years. Their history is highly credit-worthy. I must tell you about the Sati Mata temple of Gandevi, situated on the bank of a pond at crossroads. The daughter of Gopalji Desai, Ichchhaben, had become "Sati" (dying on the cremation-fire of her husband). She was the first and the last Sati in Anavil community. In her memory, Desaiji family erected a temple. The people of faith go to pay obeisance to temple where a fare is held annually during festivals of Diwali.
  • Mamadev Temple of Puni: We can go on talking this and that, but I shall contain with this last story of Puni. An Anavil brother attacked robbers to protect his sister from being robbed. He attacked robbers successfully with the help of local youth but lost his own life in the pious duty of saving the sister and village from robbers. In his memory, the grateful people of Puni erected a temple "Mamadev Temple" seen till today.
Anavils are a dynamic community ready to change for better and in the process, they have had multiple resolutions for social reforms regarding marriage, engagement, dowry, thread ceremony, death and condolence. 1868 Resolution, 1924 Kaliawadi Resolution, 1929 Puni Resolution and 1931 Paria (Taluka: Olpad) Anavil Samaj Sudharak Mandal to name a few.

Gopi Naik Raso said, "The Anavil, instead of engaging himself in duties of a Brahmin, made politics dear and achieved bright success in it. He became the pillar of the state. Power and wealth were at his feet and he remained Ajachak (Non-acceptor) and a donor. Because of being non-acceptor and donor, he enjoyed a special position amongst the Brahmins. People respected him for his power and influence with the government. His generosity earned him the nickname of "Baadshah".

With all these details, who would like this great community to vanish? The attempts to save them has to start at earliest before it is too late. In addition to Anavils themselves, the NGO and Government machinery should be active to stop their decrease in number.
Timely marriage, early children (minimum two) and marriage among the same caste of Anavils are the minimum steps.
Who will do this?
Shall we start a commercial campaign to do all this?
Or shall we start preparing museum of Anavils to show the extinguished species of Anavils?
We cannot sit and relax...

The facts and statistics in this article are based on the book Anavils of South Gujarat written by Ambelal Gopalji Desai (in Gujarati) and translated in English by Harish Desai and Hakumat Desai (1995), published by Harshad K Desai.

Also read: મોરારજી દેસાઈ (ગુજરાતી લેખ)

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Have a look at the brief survey I conducted on Facebook.
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And the feedback I received.
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The sun is hot, so provides heat...
It's enlightened, so provides light...


Gujarati synonyms for the sun are Suraj (સૂરજ), Bhaskar (ભાસ્કર), Ravi (રવિ )...

Here is a coincidence to quote:
  • The father's name was Bhaskar (Sun) till he started the school
  • And the son's name was Ravi (Sun) till he started the school
Their parents changed their names in school as Bharatchandra and Rahul, respectively!
Being a member of the male-dominated culture and having an Anavil inheritance of male-ego, I was wrongly considering myself superior to my wife Dr Bhavana Desai (Devyani). I want to confess, I was wrong.


We visit Saputara (the only hill station in Gujarat) round the year for pleasure trips. Similarly, the devotees of Sai Baba visit Shirdi frequently. For a change and possibly a better experience, I’d like to suggest you visit Shivarimal (a Free Residential School for Visually Impaired (Blind) and Physically Challenged Children), about 20 km from Saputara and 93 km away from Bilimora on Bilimora-Saputara road. Let me tell you my reasons for details.

My close friend Piyushbhai Dharaiya formed a charitable trust in the name of his wife Late Jyotsanaben and decided to donate the interest away, every year. I suggested him to visit Shivarimal School for Blind Children and experience the emotions of blind students. We finally visited this place on Sunday, February 16th, 2014 and the result is this introductory article.

Whatever idealistic discussions we do, there are certain emotions that come out without our will – involuntarily. Hatred is one of them. I shall introduce the subject first.

Penguin dictionary describes Hate as a deep enduring intense emotion expressing animosity, anger and hostility towards a person, group or object. So, hate is deep and emotional dislike created by ideas, individuals, entities or objects.

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    ભારતના ભૂતપૂર્વ વડાપ્રધાન શ્રી. મોરારજી દેસાઈ આપણી વચ્ચે જીવ્યા અને મર્યા. તેમને માટે આપણને સૌને ગર્વ છે. કારણ તેઓ ગુજરાતી હતા. આપણી જેમ અ...

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

An ophthalmologist by qualification and profession, Dr. Bharatchandra Desai loves reading about history, religion, and spirituality. He has written about them and also about 'Anavils' at length.

ABOUT THE BLOG

When I started writing on my blog, I used to ask myself if I should write at all. If yes, why? I would like to share my views on this topic with you.
I write for myself. This may sound egoistic, but it is self-explanatory as well. Because I want freedom from my thought cycle, I get mental catharsis by just writing out whatever it is. While having some serious events with myself, say the death of my mother first and then father, writing down makes a record of my emotions at a given time which I’m never going to repeat.
I do write for my daughter Vaishali, son Rahul and their friends. I want to tell my experiences and let them know about me. I have done this in Life At 60 article series – it is my mini-autobiography, telling all about me. Article on Marriage, Parents in old-age homes, etc. are other such articles.

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