Why and how should we visit our close relatives/friends? Close relatives are the best God-gift,. I would first like to talk about who they are, to start this article. They are:
In fact, now-a-days it is a luxury to have any of above, because, modern trend of delayed pregnancy and family planning is leading to zero or one child families which will end with no close-relative in near future. If you have parents alive, at least one brother and/or sister and seniors having a son and/or daughter, you are the most blessed person, because they are the only barriers to mental stress or insult.
Present day culture of not visiting any relative or visiting very less frequently as a flying visit (just to say hi-hello) must change, because these relations are great psychological support in mental stress and trauma. When nobody supports in disturbing situations, these are the ones to be relied upon.
Before going to the etiquette or technique of visit, I’d like to explain some relations.
Well, the protocol demands following to be observed:
The best method of maintaining relations is visiting them frequently.
It is a great mental catharsis anyone can have.
- Parents
- Son/daughter
- Brother/sister
- Above relatives-in-law and
- Close friends
In fact, now-a-days it is a luxury to have any of above, because, modern trend of delayed pregnancy and family planning is leading to zero or one child families which will end with no close-relative in near future. If you have parents alive, at least one brother and/or sister and seniors having a son and/or daughter, you are the most blessed person, because they are the only barriers to mental stress or insult.
Present day culture of not visiting any relative or visiting very less frequently as a flying visit (just to say hi-hello) must change, because these relations are great psychological support in mental stress and trauma. When nobody supports in disturbing situations, these are the ones to be relied upon.
Before going to the etiquette or technique of visit, I’d like to explain some relations.
A. Parents:With all these details in mind, I am forced to say, one must visit close relatives and friends frequently.
Parents are the relatives always ready to help and share your pleasures/problems.
Parents can be taken for granted and still they are with you forever.
Even though the offspring not respecting them, even insulting them, they are ready to forgive them to be with them.
I cannot stress much, but frequent visit to them is ideal.
B. Sister/Brothers:
Nature – say God – given relatives are brothers and/or sisters.
There are chances they may not be at par with parents and may not be taking the relations seriously and still they are worth being in touch by frequent visits.
C. Daughter/Sons:
However financially and socially settled the parents are and however fit physically they may be, parents need physical and moral support from their offspring. Parents have to be cautious in maintaining the dignity of this relation.
D. In-laws:
The above statements apply equally to in-laws relations.
E. Friends:
The modern time of living rely more on friends and they are not wrong.
Well, the protocol demands following to be observed:
1. Appointments:In conclusion, I will say, close-relations and friends are the best God-gift. They must be taken great care of.
However close and important you are, you have no right to disturb them at your will anytime and every time. Before planning your visit, you must contact and ask about their convenience to know whether they are available and free to be with you. If they have some tour program, celebrations elsewhere, some social engagements or important professional work, you must not disturb that. Actually your presence is not welcome. Do not hesitate and feel free to tell your plan and let them confirm before you go.
2. Gift/present:
Formalities demand to carry meaningful and useful gift to present. In addition to the gift, specialty eatables of your place, chocolates, cakes, snacks, or biscuits, etc. are must. However rich and affording a person is, these things appeal and please the most and are eagerly awaited for.
3. Duration and Frequency:
The visit must not be a flying visit – enter and come-out type. A couple of days or at least, a night is ideal. During evening and late night, one can share and meet at leisure. If this is not possible, a lunch/dinner visit is minimum.
Ideal number of visit in my opinion is every quarterly or minimum is twice a year.
4. Manners:
While your stay, host must feel at ease and happy.
You must adjust with the time-table and your manner must be pleasing.
Whatever difference of opinion you have, the talk or discussion should not mean hot argument or quarreling.
They must feel your need for next visit at earliest.
While leaving home, you must invite them to visit your place too.
The best method of maintaining relations is visiting them frequently.
It is a great mental catharsis anyone can have.
How true! The whole concept of visiting relatives (long, overnight stays) is almost dead now. Unless we put conscious efforts, we'll soon cross that thin line between 'personal space' and 'loneliness'. And that transition would be far damaging and depressing.
ReplyDeleteWith horizons spreading, the families are falling more and more apart; revolutionary transit and communication technologies are barely bridging the gap. What worse, we're getting used to and settled with this concept of 'virtually' staying in 'touch' even with the closest people. I don't know if I can blame our so-called metro/cosmopolitan culture for this.
Whatever the reason, as you rightly pointed, we need to recognize who our close-ones are and make conscious effort to visit them frequently as possible. It's easier to maintain than putting all the efforts for damage-control later on.
Very relevant and insightful article!
Rahul,
DeleteI am happy you have responded fast.
You have very rightly understood my theme of being actively trying to be with the labelled close-ones.
The warning signal is here, if we ignore that nothing can help.
Very nicely analyzed the importance of relatives and friends .
DeleteIn present day scenario ,inspite of all luxuries and amenities psychiatric problems including loneliness ,insecurity and lack of attention have increased .
A good relative and friend can play a major role in sustaining relations ,stability sharing stress and build up mutual trust .
Enjoyed reading the whole blog
I really feel blessed by having relatives and friends, whom I can call any time and can go to their place whenever i want to.
ReplyDeleteVery Nice.
Vaishali.
Absolutely Right Bharatbhai. Nowadays females are reluctant to have more than 1 Child. They Think that it takes many years to grow and to educate children. This is wrong thinking.
ReplyDeleteAppointment to visit sister,brother not necessary. If it is so then there is a lack of love and affection. I often visit my Maasi and her sons and a daughter. I do not need to inform in advance. yes, visit is always short..for an hour or two.
Anyway thanks for inviting me to express my views on relationship.
In modern digital era, face to face interactions are hard to come by. I m lucky to live in village where people still find such informal ways to bridge their lives. Your research is remarkable. Always hope for the best
ReplyDelete