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Before Saying "Yes" For Marriage

Typically marriages are decided by one of these two methods in our society:
  1. Arranged Marriage: Socially accepted and practised method where ‘offer’ for marriage is given by appropriate party and then, marriage is finalized on the basis of match-making.
  2. Love Marriage: Recently established way of selecting marriage partner after some contact, friendship and/or attraction because of looks. Here prospective partners for marriage decide themselves marry with or without consent from parents and families.
Well, either way, the final decision of marriage is made after checking the possibility of matching with each other on the basis of social, academic, financial and/or physical appearance.


The new addition of ‘matching horoscopes’ has appeared on the scene recently. Marriage proposals are refused on the so-called matching of the horoscope is not there.

What is hardly considered and ignored in total is the ‘Pre-marital detailed medical check-up’ of both of the partners. This article is to bring to notice the importance of issue(s) of health for the success of any marriage.

I will give three real-life examples to explain my point.
  1. A female partner having serious Heart Disease at the time of and before marriage did not inform anyone about this. So the to-be-married happy groom was unaware of it. To his shock and surprise, the wife died on the day of marriage.
  2. A female partner was having Epilepsy - well controlled with medicines, but she omitted to let anyone know and stopped medicines too. She wanted to hide the disease because of its social taboo. She had an epileptic fit – convulsions – on the very night of marriage and the end result was none other than divorce. A similar story can be said about Leucoderma – a white patch on the body.
  3. Male partner was having AIDS before marriage. He passed this to his wife who died within five years of marriage and husband died five more years after that.
So many examples can be cited here, but those few are just to introduce the subject, explain the seriousness of the issue and make you aware of the subject.

When I talk about the particular disease, it has two interpretations:
  1. Certain diseases make simple life and/or married life difficult to the extent partner having one may die soon.
  2. Certain diseases are transmitted to the offspring having a hereditary element.
Let me explain this in details.

To get rid of problems in married life, one has to get the premarital medical check-up.
It should be in form of 1. Simple history talking, 2. The medical examination by a specialist, and 3. Laboratory investigations, and 4. Other related tests.

Medical History:

You will be surprised to know a simple questioning regarding having any disease reveals great surprises. Each going-to-be partner should ask simple questions about having any disease of importance, any need of getting hospitalized for certain treatment and/or operation/surgery. This can lead to understanding the status of each. One more question is must regarding any inherited disease on paternal or maternal parents.

Physical Examinations:

A total body check-up is ideal including Eye, E.N.T. and following:
  1. Physician: BP, heart, lungs and all systems should be checked.
  2. Urologist: Male must be examined for normal external sex organs.
  3. Gynaecologist: Female partner check-up for normalcy of her external sex organs.
  4. Psychiatrist opinion regarding both cannot be over-emphasized.
Haematological Studies:
  1. Blood group with Rh factor
  2. Hepatitis
  3. Sickle cell anaemia
  4. Thalassemia
  5. Aids and
  6. Diabetes

Semen Analysis:
  • For sperm count and motility
  • X-ray chest
  • Electrocardiogram (ECG)
  • Sonography (Abdomen)
Hereditary Diseases:

The disease that appears in new-born - because one/both parents were having it and passed to the offspring - is known as hereditary diseases. They are transmitted by 23 pairs of chromosomes. I can give a big list of more than 400 diseases, but I will enlist only most common few.
  • Colour-blindness
  • Retinitis pigmentosa
  • Hereditary blindness
  • Angelman syndrome
  • Coeliac disease
  • Down syndrome
  • Tay - Sachs disease
  • Turner's syndrome
  • Prader- Willis syndrome
  • Klinfelters syndromes
  • Canavan's disease
  • Sickle-cell disease
  • Haemophilia
  • Thalassemia
  • Hemochromatosis
  • Polycystic kidney
  • Phenylketonuria
  • Neurofibromatosis Duchene muscular dystrophy
  • Epilepsy
  • Chorea
  • Schizophrenia
  • Manic-depressive insanity
So, a million dollar would be: How to prevent such diseases?
  1. Avoid marriage.
  2. Investigate to-be-partner for hereditary disease and avoid marriage with one having any of such disease(s).
  3. Avoid being parents at all either voluntarily or by sterilization operation.
You will be surprised to know one country is having the law of compulsory sterilization of person having a hereditary disease and who has been admitted to a mental asylum or a prisoner.

To conclude,
  • I will say awareness of medical issues before marriage is a must.
  • If you can, for detailed medical investigations, it is ideal.
  • Minimum is asking questions regarding the prevalence of any disease.
Now I can say, BEST wishes for long and happy married life!!


Comments

  1. Good point. I have seen people doing painstaking research on horoscopes (which, I think is an utter waste of time and resources) and not even give a slightest consideration to possible medical records/history.

    Also, due to our social norms (that are not conductive to openness), there's a practical implementation issue here which is difficult to overcome.

    -- Vishal

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Vishal,

      I am happy you have accepted the fact that we do not give even slightest importance to medical problems. Here we need to be aware and active, then only it will serve some purpose.

      I liked your activeness in responding.

      Thanks,
      Dr Bharat Desai

      Delete
  2. Varna Points Significance:
    Outer appearance.
    Classical (Implicit) Power.
    Dominance of nature with regards to temperament and general health of the spouses.
    Work and Spiritual Development.
    Note: This aspect is particularly important for Kshatriyas the warriors or fighting class which is engaged in escorting the society in particular and the nation at large.
    Vashya Points Significance:

    Dominance of Love or Attraction with peace and harmony intensity of mutual love between Male & Female.
    Abilities of understanding of Love mutually through physical attraction (Includes personality).
    Note: This (Vashya Point) is important for everyone.
    Tara Points Significance:

    Tara represents destiny i.e. by and large prosperity, Happiness and Growth, collectively called fortune of the couple.
    Note: Tara Points is important for everyone.
    Yoni Points Significance:

    Yoni represents mentality and interaction between the spouses (i.e. proposed couple). This describes the basic compatibility while living together.
    Note: This aspect or trait is particularly important for Shoodras (Shudras), i.e. the labour or servant class in the society. As per our mythology of occult science Yoni is considered to be equivalent to species given to organism as a result of deeds in the previous births. Yoni aspect reflects the nature proneness to trifles and violent actions of persons.
    Gana Points Significance:

    Gana represents the quality of adaptability to the circumstances, the temperament, actions, tastes, likings, talents etc. of the spouses in question.
    Note: The aspect of Gana is specially relevant in 'Vaishyas', the business and trade community.
    Graha Points Significance:

    Rashi Swami represents friendship between couple, their mental capabilities, integrity and understanding each other.
    Note: This aspect is important for everyone irrespective of caste or creed etc.
    Bhakoot Points Significance:

    Bhakoot is related to Rashi or Moon signs or Lunar signs. In our Astrology the Moon is related to or has a direct relationship with mind, i.e. Mental soundness. There goes a line in Sanskrit Chandrama Manso Jatah meaning thereby The Moon was born from mind.
    So Bhakoot represents the following qualities or Traits.
    Mental Soundness, Life of Children, Economic Conditions or Status, Marital Bond or Attachments.
    Nadi Points Significance:

    Nadi represents health, longevity and fertility. In other words it is related is ailments of the couple, age and fertility of bearing the issues. Nadis are three Aadya, Madhya and Antya. Nadi represent genetic setup in the knowledge of Astrology. Two identical 'Nadis' of Male and Female spouses are not acceptable in Astrology. This gives birth to the idea that cross matching or breeding is healthier sign for generation. Now modern science has also explored and found the fact as true. It is widely known fact now that cross-breeds (hybrids) give best or at least better results.

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Generally, the wedding of a daughter is event parents plan from the day of her birth. They start saving money and dream about the son-in-law to be. But all these have one condition tagged – “Consent of Parents”. Or say a final decision has to be with and as per the will of the parents. When this does not happen and daughter decides to marry at her own will – against the consent of parents, they get shocked emotionally to its deepest level and this is the subject of my discussion.

મા પાર્વતી

ભગવાન શિવ-શંકર-મહાદેવ અને ગણેશ વિષે આપણે ખૂબ જ ભક્તિભાવ ધરાવતા હોઈએ છીએ. એ બન્ને વિષે જાતજાતની માહિતી રાખીએ છે. પણ તેમના કુટુંબના અગત્યના સભ્ય પાર્વતી-મા દુર્ગા-વિષે લગભગ અજ્ઞાત છીએ. ચાલો, મા પાર્વતીને વિગતે ઓળખીએ. પર્વતપુત્રી તે પાર્વતી પર્વત રાજા હિમાવત અને માતા મેનાવતીની પુત્રી પાર્વતીનો ભગવાન શિવ પતિ છે, તો ગણેશ અને કાર્તિકેય   પુત્રો છે. પાર્વતિના ભાઈ વિષ્ણુ અને બહેન નદી ગંગા છે. આ સામાજીક પરિચય વાળી મા પાર્વતીને પર્વતને લીધે શૈલજા, અદિજા, નાગજા, ગિરિજા, અને હેમવતી તરીકે પણ ઓળખવામા આવે છે.